If Mommas Happy.....

There's the saying "if momma ain't happy then no one's happy." There's a lot of truth in that saying. My children are three and five. I've been a Momma for 5 years now and you would think that I've figured out what makes me happy and what pushes my buttons during the course of a day?? Well, as you know when you have tackled one issue another issue seems to come along. Our children grow and they may pass through a difficult stage but then comes along the next stage and along with giggles and smiles to make any cranky momma melt also, come new challenges. 

Are you at least 3 years into Mama hood and still feeling the baby blues at times? You're not alone. If you're a momma; you and most other mommas have felt those not so happy feelings ,during the course of a day!

I came across an article yesterday "8 ways to be a happier mom" I posted 6 that stood out to me...tips to becoming a happier mom....

1)Admit when you're stressed

 (go ahead admit it!! We all get stressed)

Ironically, once you stop expecting motherhood to feel warm and fuzzy all the time, life as a mom gets easier. "It's okay to feel frustrated, angry, or irritable sometimes," says Dr. Ubel. "You're not a bad parent. It's not even a bad parenting experience. It's just normal."

2)Get enough sleep

( yeah, sure....this is huge and I need to "hear" this...) I may try to change my schedule and try to become a morning person. I've read that the hours of sleep  you get before 12:00pm are more beneficial then those after. I'm in big trouble.

Most of us know that money can't buy happiness, but who knew that a good night's sleep just might? That's a key finding of that University of Michigan study. "Making $60,000 more in annual income has less of an effect on your daily happiness than getting one extra hour of sleep a night," says study author Norbert Schwarz, Ph.D., a professor of psychology.

So how can you sneak in that extra hour or two? Misha Sauer, mom of 1-year-old Riley, says her husband takes over on the weekends so she can sleep in. "It makes a big difference in the way I feel," says the Culver City, California, mom. "And I'm more willing to do something active, like take my daughter to the park. If I'm tired, the most I can do is sit there and read to her

3) Re)consider your priorities

I've been doing this and it is amazing. I try to block out hours of time for the girls. Totally focusing on them. Then when I'm working or busy around the house, they are happy entertaining themselves and each other.

It may sound simplistic, but one key to being in a more positive mood is to structure your day so you do more things you enjoy. "It's how you spend your time, not your money, that counts," says Dr. Ubel. "If you have any financial flexibility that lets you maximize your family time, use it now. For instance, do you really need to be the one to clean the house? How about paying someone to help out? And if that's not an option, think about how clean your house really needs to be -- do you need to make the beds, or is bed-making time better spent drawing pictures with your kids?" Yeah, do the beds need to be made? Apparently not in my house...hehe

4) Go with the flow

This is my home school philosophy....ha  I do love to see the world through my children's eyes. Remembering that watching an ant farm and wanting Momma to come along side them to study watch the ants is science and nature to them. Fun!

Time seems to slow down when you're doing what you enjoy, whether it's gardening or running laps. People who experience this level of engagement -- which psychologists call "flow" -- are happier than people who rarely do. And you're lucky to have a master of it right before you: your child. "To you and me, every leaf and ant is pretty much the same, but not to a toddler," says Reivich. "So try to actively notice things as your child does -- the ant dragging a piece of bread, for instance."

Bringing more of your best qualities -- your strengths -- to the often mundane tasks of child rearing can also help you feel more engaged. "One of my strengths is humor," Reivich says. "I was making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for my kids one day, and I started talking like it was a cooking show: 'Now I'm browning the bread, now I'm applying a thin layer of peanut butter.' It transformed a mundane task into something we could all enjoy."

5)Reconnect with your spouse

I feel we have done this well. It helps that my husband has a flexible schedule. We're not trying to fit everything from the day into a few hours...just taking care of business. We talk throughout the day so when he gets home we already have a grasp of how our days where.

A supportive group of friends and family is one of the cornerstones of a happy life, and for many moms, the center of that social circle is their partner. That's why it's so important to keep the lines of communication open, especially during the "diaper years" -- infancy to age 3 -- that experts say are the most stressful on a marriage.

"You can't say, 'I'll handle the relationship later,'" says Reivich. "A healthy and realistic goal is to ask, 'What are some small, manageable things we can do to keep our connection strong during this rough time?'" It can be as easy as going food shopping together, she says. "Once you make little steps, it's easy to move on to bigger ones, like a night out."

Even discussing how stressed you both are can help. "If you can both just say, 'Raising a kid is hard,' putting it out there diminishes the strain," says Sauer

6) Say thanks

Yeah, If my kids would say it to me more; I'd be a little happier! haha

Feeling grateful is a mood booster. It can be as simple as saying grace every night or finding new ways to acknowledge others. "When our extended family gets together, we go around the room and say one thing we appreciate about each person," says Elizabeth Howard, mom of Reilly, 2, in Anaheim, California.

Another effective way is to put what you're thankful for down on paper: Write the three best things that happened today. Experts say that if you do that every day for two weeks, your feelings of well-being will increase.

Of course, you'll still have bad days. But at least you'll be less likely to think there's something wrong with you. And the more you engage in positive thinking, the more you'll realize how much happiness is under your control. "I think of happiness as three things -- enjoyment, satisfaction, and fulfillment," says Ryan. "Mothering can give us any one of those at any given moment. Yep, but not necessarily all of them at the same time!"

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Enjoy your Tuesday and figure out ways to nurture yourself!

love, to the moon and back

Donna

Comments

[Becki]

This is such great advice and all things I need to remember. I think as moms we just always try to do it all and we don't want to show that we are sweating, ya know? I am definitely going to put this into practice! ((HUGS))

[Sheila]

All great advice/tips! I have to remind myself to go with the flow, reconnect and and re-prioritize!

[Chrissy]

I think you might have written this post just for me!

[killlashandra]

Thanks for stopping by!

I have to totally agree with all your points. However, right now that whole get enough sleep thing keeps eluding me. I have to work on that one more. :)